Book: Laziness Does Not Exist (Part 2)

The laziness lie tells us that we must earn our right to be loved or to have a place in society. We work as hard to accumulate achievements and awards to earn the respect and acceptance of others. Marginalised people face the pressure of society to go above and beyond the expectation and work harder than average people. To overachieve for self-protection. The laziness lie promotes a culture of success-obsession at the price of mental and physical health of the person. 

Achievements are fleeting. They can never give us true self-satisfaction. There is no victory great enough to overcome the laziness lie. The lie tells us that we must never be satisfied, to keep running for every new opportunity again and again. When we are obsessed with achievements, it makes life less rewarding and enjoyable. 

So many parts of our lives have turned into performance - fitness goals, hobbies, travels, and even our social activities on Facebook and Instagram. People are constantly vying for attention, likes, reactions and followers. Zapping the joy and leisure of our lives.

Finding joy and meaning comes down to savouring. Savouring is the process of deeply and presently enjoying a positive experience. When a person savours, they relish the things they love and devote full attention to experiencing them in a mindful and appreciative way.

Mental habits that dampen happiness. 

• Suppression: hiding positive feeling due to shyness, modesty or fear;

• Distraction: Ignoring the joy of the moment and concerning yourself with other things;

• Fault-finding: Disregarding the positive side of the experience and focusing on what is lacking or could be better;

• Negative mental time travel: Anticipating negative events that can happen in the future or reminiscing on painful experiences in the past.

This is what our cultural obsession of achievement hunting has done to us. Even something that is supposed to be pleasurable like taking a vacation or receiving an award becomes a new obligation to document and share with the world via social media. This keeps us from ever living in the moment or taking genuine pride in the things we’ve done.

There are steps we can take to break out from overachieving patterns. Because life is ought to be so much more than being productive and impressing other people with your achievements.

Learning how to savour

• Behavioural displays: showing happiness like smiling, jumping for joy, singing;

• Being present: focusing on the experience as it happens, pushing distractions away and being mindful;

• Capitalising: communicating about a positive experience to other people;

• Positive mental time travel: reflecting on happy memories. 

Make time for awe

To consciously find time to experience awe. Awe is when we experience something new or inspiring like basking through the great blue sky or enjoying a new musical piece. Seek moments of awe and wonder with nature. Expose yourself to novel interesting stimuli - visit a new city you have never been to, take a new route back home, study a subject you knew nothing about,  try to appreciate an art form you have never spent much time with before, or ask a friend or co-worker to tell you about a subject that excites them.

Try something you are bad at

When we accept failure we learn that our lives have meaning regardless of what we can or can’t do. When we pursue an activity that we can’t possibly succeed, we force ourselves to enjoy the process rather than the end product. Failing at something that society has told us to do can be a revolutionary act. When we fail, we find ourselves pushing back against the pressure to generate value for other people. Failure quietly loses, and in losing it imagines other goals for life, love, art and being. When we fail, we become free to choose what we want our goals and priorities to be rather than following the expectation of others.